I thought cats suppose to have 9 lives..

Its amazing how something that you feel is insignificant to you can affect you so much emotionally when that thing is gone. I always brand myself as one of the active members in the 'ANTI-CATS CLUB' (if they have one) and never like cats nor will touch any of them.

As most of you know, last saturday, our family just brought in a lost-malnutrition-pitiful kitten that was wandering outside our house. No mummy of the kitten can be seen after we spotted the poor kitten few days before my mum and sis decided to keep her at home for the moment. I was the only one in the family that can't wait for other people to adopt the kitten as I just can't stand cats, moreover, 'lepak-ing' freely in my house!!!!

For the 1st 2 days, I find the kitten (or affectionately called as PINGU by my 2 sis) very annoying, following me everywhere she possibly can. Staring at me with those pittiful 'cat-in-boots' eyes like the one that is shown in SHREK and hoping that I will just sayang her and manja her. I ignored her and hoping that she will be taken away and even push people to take her away on Jess' surprise party. The only time I touched her and really sayang-ed her was when I accidentally hurt her when I wanted to close the door. GUILTY strucks me.. and I just kept saying sorry and just sayang her la.. That was the 1st time I touched a cat after sooooooooo long...

PINGU left us yesterday night.. She was ill.. doctor told mummy that she's very ill and actually underweight for a kitten her age. There's nothing much we can do. We are not god, we can't communicate with her... We do not know whether she's in pain or what.. but she just left us unexpectedly.. When i actually began to like her alot.. (and I wasn't aware).. I was stunned when Jess told me that PINGU died.. I was speechless at the moment.. Went down to watch an episode of 'HOUSE' just to keep my mind occupied and not think about her.. After the show, went into the room, and tears just running down from my eyes. Jess and Amanda cried too.. Each of us holding a tissue and just started crying. We miss her.. we never expect she will impact our lives so much.. She was in our house for just one week!! It was a very emotional sat night.. where i actually cried myself to sleep. Even now blogging, my tears just can't stop.. I really miss PINGU.. I regretted ignoring her, assuming that I hated cats.. I regretted for not giving her more care, assuming that she's well.. I regretted alot of things.. but time just can't change the history.

PINGU is just special.. although our family is not a cat lover but she has turned our lives upside down and we trully miss her.. She's tiny, she's adorable, she's just sweet.. but seriously, I will not consider a cat as my pet in the future..unless the cat looks like the cute little thing above. The spot where we put a towel for her to play with and lie down is empty.. no more black and white thing rolling on the towel.. No more PINGU following me around with that cute little eyes.. No more me always watching out for PINGU so that she will not come near me.. Wei loong, if u are reading this, pls do not find a kitten for my family. Enough of dramas man.. PINGU, i wish u have 9 lives like what the books and tales always say..I wish you can just revive back and 'meow' to us.. I wish we can do something to let u live longer and experience life with us.. But at least.. u dont need to suffer much.. I miss u, pingu, i really do.. Rest in peace.... love u..

Can't Sleep..

- This post is caused by the hyper-active bug in me that has been buggin me and causing me to CAN'T SLEEP.. and writing randomly...

- I wanna eat Pasta right now.. I'm hungry at 2.47am.. I'm always hungry anyway..

- Can't wait to go Sungai Wang in few hours time.. I know its labelled as a 'LALA' heaven but its a really good place to grab some really cheap stuff k.. Driving is the fastest and safest way.. but I am so lazy to drive..

- I miss Sau Kin... So many things to tell her.. so little time to meet.. both so busy..

- Life after break up isn't that bad after all.. Thank God for my family and my dear friends that supported me all the way..

- I have a camp to attend in March, 1 young adults retreat to go on May (so called singles camp.. haha), another expected HUGE once-in-4-years camp to come up on August.. And a confirmed Youth camp to serve on December..I need more money!!! Oh.. did I mentioned that I want to go for at least one mission trip this year? Oh.. I just said it.. crap.. more money needed!!!!

- I'm really enjoying serving in church.. Though i have to wake up early on sunday mornings for practises for back-up singing, but its worth it. I'm really feeling the importance of attending cell group too (i wasn't that active last 2 years la..and always skip whenever I can think of excuses..always kena marah from Wuan chin and Grace..).. And the joy of picking up people to go cell with you.. Serving God is not all about doing things on stage.. Thank god that Wei Loong and Brian are attending YAF.. Their presence do spice up the cell abit.. (though our cell is very happening d.. haha.. self-praise) Praying for more to attend cell..

- I wanna play CS!!!! I'm not addicted to it k.. Addiction is defined as something you have to do everyday!! if you don't do it.. you will feel shaky and all head spinning.. I do not have such moments.. Just really enjoy playing it ma.. Its fun to see all the men all serious when comes to killing their own friends in the cyber world..

Phew.. it was quite a success..

Finally the day I've been waiting for!! The surprise party for Jessica!! It wasn't easy to plan a surprise party since we are living at the same house and it is never easy to keep a secret from your sis who sleeps in the same room as you! But, i'm glad and I thank god that yesterday's party went pretty well and she was shocked instead of surprise.. haha.. Thanks to all my friends and her friends that made all these possible!! Thanks to the YAF people especially Jeffrey who came out to play CS with me and Jess to baby sit her while my family was preparing for the party. Thanks to Jeremy who took her out to get her gift and also to babysit her while Jeff sends some of the guys to my house. Thanks to the MC cum game leader- Nicholas Aaron and his konchos- Kwang Yew and Wei loong for all the quirky games and lame stunts. Without u guys, the party wouldn't be that fun and entertaining! Thanks to Joel who helped me to buy watermelons last minute alongwith Samantha and for coming early. Thanks to Brian Chow who helped me to clean up abit after the whole party. Thanks to everyone who came and stopped by just to make Jessica feel so special.. She really had a great time and obviously touched to see so many of you there! And last but not least, thanks to my parents and Amanda who really went all out just to make this a success. Thanks to Daddy and mummy who's willing to pay for some of the expenses and everything else!!! Thanks to Kenneth and Kristine (our cousins) who came early and helped us to get the food..

The pics and the video will come out soon.. but now this is the summary of the party:

- Dominos Pizza (buy 5 free 5) Rm 150.00
- KFC (2 Barrels) + side dishes Rm 130.00
- Chocolate banana yummy B'day cake Rm 75.00
- Fried Bihun + nuggets + cheese sausage Rm 60.00
- Fruits and drinks and ice Rm 50.00
- Sms and phone calls to pull her friends Rm 50.00 or more
- Miscellaneous Rm 100.00 or more
- The shock look on her face when she opened the door PRICELESS

haha.. Jess, i hope you had a great time and all the best in your new 17th year of life! Sorry that i can't get the Ukelele that u always wanted.. everywhere is out of stock!! So frustrating to go to almost every music shop that i know and being told that they have no stock or they don't even know what on earth is a ukelele.. But i'm almost broke after getting the cakes and stuff.. next year maybe.. depending on how nice you will be to me..

seriously, i will not plan anymore parties after this.. so exhausted after the whole thing man!! But it was all worth it!!

ITS YOUR BIRTHDAY, LITTLE MONKEY..

Dear Jessica,

Ever since you came to this world 17 years back,

You snatched away daddy and mummy's attention from me..

Ever since you came to this world 17 years back,

You have been bugging me and never let me have any peace..

Ever since you came to this world 17 years back,

Everybody says you look so much cuter than me when I was a baby..

Ever since you came to this world 17 years back,

I loved you and still love you and will always do..

You brought joy to almost everyone around you..(especially me and Amanda)

You never fail to be there for the people you care and love..

You always work hard on something you believe and never give up..

And your gorgeous smile will always brighten up my (and the rest's) day!

I know you will kill me for putting up these poser pics of yours.. (who cares? =P)

If u dare to take, must dare to show ma.. (haha)

You look great on camera.. never doubt about yourself!

Your obssession on photography is insane but undoubtly, you take quite nice pictures that I myself will just 'WOW' (with jaw dropping)...

The Soo sisters doing crazy things together..
We were that bored waiting for some people for CS that we try acting KAWAII in the car..
You can be so crazy sometimes that you will sniff on peppers..
And play horse with small kids in shopping malls..

But, no matter what.. you are and will always be my lovely gorgeuos CUTE sister...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESSICA!!!

I KNOW YOU HAVE A LONG LIST OF THINGS THAT YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY, BUT SORRY THAT I CAN'T GET ANY FOR YOU.. HAHAHA..

MAY GOD'S BLESSINGS WILL ALWAYS BE OVERFLOWING ON YOU AND MAY ALL YOUR WISHES & DREAMS COME TRUE IN GOD'S TIMING!

THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH A WONDERFUL SISTER THAT I JUST CAN'T RESIST BULLY-ING..

CONTINUE TO SHINE FOR GOD AND KEEP THAT FIRE & PASSION GROWING!

HOPE YOU'LL HAVE A MEMORABLE 17TH BIRTHDAY THIS YEAR AND LOVE YOU DEAR!!
*MUAKZ*

It's 'uncle's' BIRTHDAY!!

Dear Uncle,


I've been so blessed to know you since the start of YAF..
You have helped me so much in so many ways that you don't need to..
I thank God for the opportunity to get to know you..
You are a good Tai Koh, a good friend, a good listener and most of all, a good 'uncle' to me..
I just don't know how to express how much I appreciate you and how much you have impacted my life..

You can be quite a good poser sometimes..

Always enjoyed your company.. your lame jokes... your sarcasm.. your quirky sense of humour and the 'weird' hairstyles..

Trips will not be the same without you.. Always felt safe when you are around because I know you will definitely jaga your youngest koncho here..

Thank you 'uncle' for being such a special friend.. Although you are getting older today, you will always be the 'uncle' that i respect and love..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY UNCLE!!!

(I BETTER NOT DISCLOSE YOUR AGE..)

ALL THE BEST IN EVERYTHING YOU WANNA PURSUE AND NEVER GIVE UP!!!

'SENGET-SAU-SOCIETY' WILL ALWAYS SUPPORT YOU!

THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH A NAGGY UNCLE..

LOVE YOU!! *HUGX*

AWKWARD..

Its just sad when a friendship just went downhill because of mistakes the 2 person made and also the avoidable arguments between the 2 parties. What was considered a close friendship before turned out to be pretty sour now as misunderstandings are accumulating and miscommunications are just so common at sight.. I felt like a failure for not being able to face this person like how we used to.. Though I have been human for more than 22 years now, I am still struggling with the art of interacting and also the art of maintaining a good friendship.. I know its just rare for me to keep quiet in most occasions, but this time, I just can't speak.. lost of words.. I miss those lame jokes we made, the sarcastic remarks to each other, the level of comfortable-ness with one another, the care towards one another where sky is the limit and everything we did together..

It is quite awkward to face each other at reality after everything.. But we just can't avoid each other and act like we do not know each other.. Its jus too childish and foolish.. As much as i want to be comfortable to face this person like how I used to, sometimes I just find it real hard.. Certain words that came out before this were affecting me negatively and its just not easy to forget. The fear of eye contact in the crowd where there will be moments of awkward silence in between and everything seems to be at still for that very moment just make it harder. Flashbacks like how it was played in usual dramas just running in my head.. Oh how much I miss that.. The urge of running towards that person, giving that person a big hug like how I used to with a big smile and tell that person how important and how much I appreciate that person for just being there for me is so high. But, the EGO in me.. the EGO in us.. makes us harder to communicate like the older days.. The usual 'hi', 'How are you?' and 'Bye' have become so common and I am so frustrated that I can't do better... Frustrated that our conversations have shorten so dramatically.. frustrated that sms-es are lesser and less personal..

I wanna save this friendship.. I just do not wanna lose such good friend although we have done selfish things and there are things that this person made that I have no clue of what is the reason.. I am still waiting for an answer.. I am still waiting for an explanation.. I hate this situation.. I wanna make a difference.. I do not want this awkwardness to go on.. I pray, I hope, I wish that this person is thinking of what I am thinking too.. (although i highly doubt that this person will ever bother to read my blog again..) that we want this friendship bridge to be built again.. even stronger.. even better..

Friends come and go.. I do not lack of friends.. but I miss this friend.. its just tooo stupid to let it fades away as time pass.. praying for miracles to happen.. praying for the EGO to go away.. pray that we will just hug each other and talk nicely and figure out what went wrong..

Blogging is so good for my emotional soul.. helps me to release without asking anyone to be the listener for me.. I'm loving it..

* My family saved a very lost-pittiful-tiny-malnutrition kitten from the hush dog-scratch kitten world.. anyone interested to adopt it? I hate cats.. I have to cross my legs up when i'm typing now to avoid that kitten to just manja with my legs.. GELI!!!! I can't stand cats but I also felt pitty for this tiny creature as the mum is no where to be found.. it is not even taught properly on how to groom herself!! Its grey and white.. we plan to call her panda.. but it sounds closely like Pamela.. so i objected.. name still pending.. ANOTHER GOOD REASON FOR NOT KEEPING THIS CAT IN MY HOUSE.. I HAVE A CRAZY WHITE DOG CALLED PRINCESS WHO WILL KILL THIS CAT ANYTIME IF SHE SEES IT.. SO SAVE THE POOR SOUL PEOPLE.. START ADOPTING A CAT!! HAHA..

This is just so sweet..

My friend forwarded this video to me and it is just lovely. The artist is one creative fella and I just wish i can come out with such artwork spontaneously at such short period of time. For all you art people, this can be a good inspiration! For all you romantic female dreamers, this will make you go 'aaw...' For all you male species out there, learn some tactics man, this is a good way to impress girls.. haha..Hope you enjoy! (This is my shortest post ever!! haha.. my sisters complained that all my posts are too long and they just hate to read it.. WOW.. I DID IT MAN!! A SHORT POST!! HAHAHA..)

While waiting for the video to be uploaded.. I think i should type something to fill in the time.. haha.. American Idol is on it's 7th season right now(Astro's Star world is showing)!! They are currently showing the first stage of the show where all the weird/funny/bad singers of America with outrageous outfits and weird hairdo/makeup will go for auditions at different spots and let Simon Cowell/Randy Jackson critise them (and of course they have the ever-sweet Paula Abdul to calm and hug those crying babies that are badly critised by SIMON). Do not miss the first few episodes as these are the funniest and will make you laugh till you stomach cramps badly. Better than those comedies on tv!!! However, there are of course some really talented chaps and songtress that really make Simon's jaw dropping.. Be sure not to miss it guys.. Its really entertaining (for now..).. Once all of them are sent to Hollywood for REAL auditions, it wont be funny anymore and you will see alot of them breaking down crying due to the hell-like pressure.. After that, you will follow closely a star in the making! Kelly Clarkson is stilll my favourite American Idol.. Coz she's not skinny thin and fatter than me sometimes (her weight is like YOYO..she's similar to Oprah Winfrey wei.. they are fat and before you know it, they can look like a hot diva!they go on really strict diet which I will never be discipline anough to follow) haha..

Where is the love?

Recently, I have just finished watching a Hongkong drama series which the story evolves around a bunch of people who worked in the Airpot (handsome pilots, hot air stewardess, friendly airport crews). It is quite an old drama but I managed to get the DVD set (of course pirated) when I was in Penang during the New year as I was not able to catch it when they were aired in national TV or Astro. Anyway, it was a good drama and I did cry when watching some of the scenes.. (typical emotional crying baby)


There are some things that i learned from the show and it really touched my heart.. let me summarize abit here:


The main actress- Joyce is married to Vincent (pilot) and was happy until she thought she might have contracted Aids after saving an Aids victim from an accident and cut herself. She went and tell Vincent's best friend-Kelvin(also pilot) and just do not want Vincent to worry about her. Kelvin used to date Joyce but it didn't went well due to many misunderstandings and they gone to their seperate ways until Joyce met Vincent and got married. Vincent found out about Joyce's possibility of contracting Aids and was dissapointed that his wife did not tell him first but told Kelvin instead(her ex-lover). Vincent confronted Joyce and told her that he feels that she still loves Kelvin more than him and asked her to choose. Joyce was in shock and did not answer him right away that she loves him..and him only. So, Vincent was more crushed but he left Joyce alone to think while he went working and was the captain for the flight from Hong Kong to Rome.

While at Rome, Vincent realised that he just can't let Joyce go and made a long distance call to Joyce but Joyce was engaged on her cell phone. He called the house and left a very touching message on the answering machine telling her how much he loves her and all the things they have gone through. He was just being stupid for thinking too much and comparing himself with his best friend. After that, he saved a kid from an accident but got himself killed. News went to Hong Kong and Joyce was shocked and sad when she found out. She realised how much she loves Vincent and regreted for not telling him how much he meant to her. After listening to the message left by Vincent moments before he died, Joyce went into depression because she felt guilty and she loves him so much. (for the rest of the story, you just have to catch yourself LA.. )

This story is really an inspiration and I enjoyed the whole drama! The casts are good and the story is well-written. Anyway, we always took the people around us for granted because we always thought that they will be around us no matter what. We are humans and we are imperfect beings. We refused to confess how much they meant to us or how much we love them because of the ego in us and its just too mashi mashi to express. Asians are not good when comes to expressing compared to the Ah mohs but what harm you will get by telling the people you care that you love and care about them?

Have you told your parents how much you love them?

Have you told your siblings how much you care for them?

Have you told your darling/sweetheart/honey how much she/he meant to you?

Have you told your friends how important are they to your life?

I make it a point in my life to tell people that i really appreciate them and how much they meant to me (at least i tried k). Although i might not get the same appreciation in return but at least I know I have brigthen someone's day althought they keep saying 'no la..where got? normal la..nothing la' (u know, typical malaysian). If, (touch wood) I have to leave this world for a better place (HEAVEN!!), i will not leave this world with regrets. The point is.. you dont need to pay in order to tell them that you love them.. You wont get yourself hurt by telling all those things.. In fact, you will touch hearts and the relationship between you and that person will be stronger!!! There's nothing wrong by loving people.. there's nothing wrong by telling your friends that 'I love you guys!!!'.. You wont get yourself into jail for doing that ok..Do you need to wait until something happens to them and leave you with loads of guilt and regrets like what happened to Joyce?

So what are you waiting for? Start spreading the love people!!! PEACE!!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SU LIN!!!

You have been with me since our first year in college.. You never failed to be there for me when i'm stuck with assignments and work.. You were always there (and still there) with your listening ears whenever I get frustrated with things around me.. You never just leave me out just because we are from different background.. You were my pillar back in college and now, you are a true loyal friend after more than 4 years of knowing each other... (time really flies man) You are sort of (one of) my (many) inspiration when comes to fashion and you never bother about what people say or think about you.. that's something i really admire about you..

Thank you for everything Su Lin!!! Life back in college wouldn't be that nice for me if you weren't there... You are a great friend and may our friendship grows till our very last breath.. haha..

Happy 21st B'day and may all your wishes and dreams come true!!!

I pray that God will be with you and your family all the time and that He will guide you and lead you in your every future undertakings! I'm so blessed to have the opportunity to know you and words can't describe how much i appreciate a friend like you. May you have a wonderful 21st Year of your life (starting from tomorrow) and you will be able to find a 'soul mate'.. *hugz and muakz* haha...

reunion..

Lately, I've been busy and occupied with alot of things.. (probably that's my way to forget some of the 'not-so-nice' memories I had last year) Since the 1st day of new year, i've been getting myself injured almost everywhere of my body (being the typical blur-careless Pamela) and have been quite sick as well. But it doesn't stop me from spending some pretty good times with my friends and also my family. Went and meet up with my college mates in TGIF at The Curve last Wednesday for a reunion after we went our seperate ways less than 2 years back after we finished our Diploma in Business back in Help University College. Thanks to Emily who took the initiative to organize this. Although many were not able to make it, the rest of us managed to have a pretty good time. Oh.. not forgetting the sinful-mouth-watering-big-serving food they served there.. can't wait to go there again..

This type of reunion dinners or gatherings are really good especially when you haven't met most of your friends for a pretty long time. It helps you to remember all the things you have gone through before and all the crazy things you did when you were younger. It really lifts your spirit up and reminds you on how much you've got throughout your life. Although college was quite hectic, with all the assignments/exams/crazy lecturers, but i wouldn't have gone through it without them. I'm sure you do feel the same. How many of us can actually live through our school days/college days/ working life without friends by our side? I can't help but to miss my college days after meeting them and felt sad at the same time for no being able to continue my studies up till Degree.. For those that are still persuing in their studies, do not complain.. I know you've been hearing alot of this but how long can you be a student? Once you started working, your priorities in life will shift to a higher level and the pressure you face from everywhere will be much greater than what you faced during your student life. I'm speaking through my own experience.. so i'm not crapping k..

Anyway, i'm suppose to upload the pics for my friends viewing pleasure (and also for them to copy).. Didn't expect myself to talk so much.. haha.. (typical talkative Pamela) IT TOOK ME SO LONG JUST TO UPLOAD THESE PICTURES.. (I SO WANNA COMPLAIN TO THE MANAGEMENT OF BLOGSPOT..)

Testing the camera indoors.. not so pro with the camera.. That is Joel.. forever skinny and funny..
Another test on the flash.. The 'teddy bear' is Wah Jiang and the pretty chick is Emily.. (she's taken.. sorry to dissapoint u guys)
Testing without the flash.. so dark.. oh.. this is Q-hong.. u can hardly see him smile..
the gorgeous babes.. Emily and Su wei.. (she's taken as well.. too bad..)

Bernard (my 'eldest son'), Ashton (i call him Mr bean), Joel and Jiangz..
Yen with Robin (my 'youngest son')..
My 'son' with me.. His smile looks so fake..
Charlie's angelz.. gets the attention whereever they go..

Random shots..


He's so like a teddy bear.. so cute.. haha..

Me with my 'eldest son'..


The sinful dessert.. full with cream and ice-cream at the bottom!!!
It doesn't look like what is shown on the menu though..

We spotted some friend who was dating a hot chick..

Another Sinful Temptation.. look at the chocolate cream man.. love it!!!

They looked so like husband and wife.. Get married!!!

Ashton with Yen.. Don't you think he looks a little bit like Mr Bean?

Family pic take 1.. i look so fat.. so not going to wear the top anymore.. i was lowering myself down abit so that we are able to see those at the back.. what a big sacrifice!!!
Family pic take 2.. i looked even worse.. but i still have to post for the benefit of others.. ish..

I know its abit too many pictures but I'm using Digital camera what.. no harm taking so many pictures.. Its good to look bad at all these pictures when i'm old and think back of all the good times we shared.. Pictures mean a million words.. I do regret for not taking more pictures when i was younger.. i always feel that i looked awful on pics and i still do.. But who cares? The sweet memories will not just fade with these pictures as proofs. Thank you guys for coming!! I really had a great time catching up with you all.. can't wait for our next gathering during the CNY!!! Adios!