You will never realise how fast time has passed until you clean your stuff.. I was going through my forever growing accessory collection and I saw this.. The bracelet I used to like so much that I wear it almost everytime I go out.. Its not white gold, no diamonds on it.. Just a simple puppy-shape charm bracelet with my name on it from someone I used to care and love so much..
This was given by him few years back and I really cherish it.. But things change when time change.. People change when perspective change.. I felt that somehow, if I were to be with him, things will not work out the way I want it to be.. If I were to be with him, our relationship will not have happy ending.. I told him to give up...
Few months later, I heard he's dating a girl.. I saw that girl.. She's beatiful, charming and they were holding hands.. Happily.. I was happy for him, but felt bitter deep inside.. Its ironic.. I let him go yet I felt bitter when he's with someone else.. How selfish one can be when comes to relationship... I dont own him, he deserves someone much better than me who knows how to cherish him..
After that day, I went back, I dump this charm bracelet aside.. A corner where I will not see it easily.. I was angry with it.. I was dissapointed with myself.. Dont know why..
Now, I'm in Singapore.. I dont think he even knows it.. We met once last year for lunch.. He's still quite the same in certain ways.. But different in so many other ways.. I was shocked.. Our topics were so different we can hardly click.. He wasn't happy with his life yet he has no courage to step out..
I miss him.. I miss his company when we were so much younger and naive.. I miss the times when we cycled around for hours just to be with each other.. We broke up because parents say we were too young.. then we try to get back together.. But as I said.. Years passed.. I have changed and my perspective towards life has changed as well.. I felt we werent suitable at all anymore.. I was selfish and I hurt his feeling..
But it doesn't matter anymore.. He's happy now.. and i'm happy for him.. I've yet to find the courage to message him on msn.. But I'm sure.. One day.. One day I will message him..
I am going to wear this bracelet TODAY!
p/s: I just came back from Amsterdam.. and boy, I had a great time over there!! Too bad time too short, money too little.. If you want to travel to Europe, Amsterdam is a must see k!!!! I love AMSTERDAM but not the weather..