No kidding.. Time really flies.. In fact i think time flies faster than aeroplanes.. I still remember the time when I was still in Malaysia thinking of whether I should just leave my comfort zone and come to this small little island to persue something I've never dreamt of.. And boom! Here I am, after more than 2 months of intensive training in Singapore waiting for my graduation early next month.
Life here is really like the tagline of my blog-'Life is a ROLLER COASTER'. I've been through my ups (joy and fun) and downs (fear, loneliness and failure) here and trust me.. its not easy to go through it without your family right beside you. I've cried out of loneliness few times, missing my family and friends back in Klang.. wondering what on earth they are doing and wondering whether the decisions I've made so far are right or not.. Its funny how your brain and heart will start playing the 'game' when you are all so alone and got nothing else better to do. The best way to avoid these 'mind games' is to get yourself occupied with other things. In the beginning I find it really hard to get along with my batchmates.. I really dont know why but i think most probably its just my problem.. I always feel 'small' as they are better looking and much smarter bunch.. I really felt like I was the Ugly Duckling who has no chance to turn into a beautiful majestically elegant swan no matter when.. Since grooming day itself.. My confident level just went down hill till it crashes itself and thats when I really wanna give up everything and go back to mama..
Now.. I thank God for everything that happened.. Everything that I literally forced myself to finish it till this current time.. Looking back, I think I've accomplished alot.. Looking back, I'm quite proud of myself for coming this far.. Looking back, I think I'm still the ugly duckling but personally I'm a swan in mine and family's heart.. That should be sufficient to keep me going. I'm someone that get very used to pleasing people around me and everyday I have to remind myself, as long I'm happy, dont care about what other peope think.. Honestly, I'm still struggling with it...lol.. give me some time man.. I will improve..
I'm really sorry for not updating my blog after so long..I'm really occupied with alot of things.. Housework, laundry, training, exams, tv programmes...etc.. I will try to be more discipline k.. For those back in Malaysia.. I miss u all!!!
p/s: AMANDA.. ITS 11.51PM.. I STILL CAN WISH YOU HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY HERE.. I FELT BAD FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO BE THERE TO CELEBRATE YOUR BIRTHDAY BUT I'M SURE YOU LIKE THE GIFT I GAVE (WHICH U CHOSE) RIGHT? MAY ALL YOUR WISHES AND DREAMS COME TRUE.. CAN'T BELIEVE YOU ARE SO BIG D (PHYSICALLY AS WELL..HAHA) Always remember I'll always love you no matter what and will try to be there (thought can't be physically)for you whenever you need me!!! LOVE YOU and may God bless whatever you put your hands on... *MUAKZ MUAKZ*